"Suffering borne with courage means to the devout mind a participating in the sufferings of Christ on the cross and, if bravely endured, can lighten the suffering of others. It is not a cult of suffering. It is an acceptance of the human condition." (Dorothy Day)

"For I, the Son of Man, must suffer many terrible things .... I will be rejected by the leaders, the leading priests, and the teachers of religious law. I will be killed .... If any of you wants to be my follower, you must put aside your selfish ambition, shoulder your cross, and follow me. If you try to keep your life for yourself, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for me, you will find true life." (Luke 9:21-24)

Twice a month I sit in a local cafe on Van Ness to pay bills and write thank you notes. Only a block away from my usual haunts, it is a different world from the streets and alleys of Polk Gulch. Several weeks ago, I was seated at my usual place. At a table across the way, a "gentleman" was expounding in a loud voice a variety of crude racist, homophobic and sexist remarks. He pronounced San Francisco the "cesspool of the world" where "all the s..t of Northern California gets dumped."

After the waitress delivered orders to this fellow and his companion, she passed my table with the comment, "Father Sims, you want ice tea as usual?" A moment later, a plate of food was slammed into my face, accompanied by a stream of vile comments and namecalling. Apparently my name was the trigger for this attack. It reminded me that, given the work we do in Temenos, I must always live my life with a question around my name. I am constantly a target for rumors, a container for other people's phobias.

Friends often witness my struggle after I've experienced one of these painful episodes. They understand my fears, not only for my physical safety, but for my integrity within the community. They witness the depression, the awful darkness that often follows such treatment. They ask, "Why do you keep on putting up with this? Why not just live a regular life?"

The answer is as simple as it is unfathomable to the mindset of this day: this is the apostolic ministry to which I've been called. It is the way in which I have been led to live out the mystery of the Gospel and its values. Fr. Louie Vitale, pastor at St. Boniface Church and a Temenos board member, put it this way: "You knew when you came here that the cross you chose could lead to emotional, possibly even physical death. You knew you'd be the target of character assassination or being jailed falsely. This is the cross you have chosen." My friend Sr. Bernie Gavin says these things are "intrinsic to the journey."

Dorothy Day reminds us in her own life and her words that suffering is a necessary part of discipleship and that in our suffering we share in the suffering of Christ. We might prefer things to be otherwise, but discipleship means taking the risk of opening ourselves to the experience of suffering, of the cross. Without the cross, there can be no resurrection. The cost is sometimes great and painful, but the resurrection joy that is God's gift to us ultimately exceeds any suffering.

This Lent, I encourage you to be open tv the "yes" of God, and to the painful joy of discipleship.

LARRY TURNER

Larry Turner, 27, died February 13, 2001 at St. Francis Hospital of AIDS complications. Larry's journey had been difficult, as he struggled not only with his disease, but sexual identity issues and drug addiction. In this struggle, he found God's presence and ultimately he totally embraced God, letting all go into his loving Creator's hands.

A Service of Death and Resurrection for Larry was celebrated by Fr. River on March 1st, with burial at Chapel of the Chimes Cemetery in Hayward

We are seeking memorial gifts to purchase a gravestone for Larry. The fund has been seeded by a $50 donation. If you are interested in participating, please send a check to Temenos marked "Turner Memorial." Any funds received beyond the cost of Larry's marker will be held in reserve for future internments.

Larry's family and Fr. River join in expressing special appreciation to Sr. Patrick of the St. Anthony Foundation, Fr. Louie Vitale of St. Boniface, and the Sullivan Funeral Home for their generosity in providing for the service and burial.

STATIONS OF THE CROSS

Our annual Stations of the Cross will be held from 2:00 to 4:00 p.m. on Good Friday, beginning on the steps of the California State Office Building. This will be a time of reflection and of non-violent protest of the continued crucifixion of the homeless and the incarcerated by the City and State.

MAUNDY THURSDAY

Maundy Thursday Eucharist will be celebrated at 6:00 p.m. in Cedar Alley at Polk Street, between Geary and Post.

OUR THANKS

We are, as always, grateful for your generosity in all the gifts that support this ministry.

For almost seven years Ternenos has depended on your faithfulness and, through you, Christ has been ministered to in the bodies of his poor. Thank you.

ALTERNATIVE SPRING BREAK GROUPS

March 26 - 31, and the first week of April, Alternative Break Groups from Stanford will be here in the City working with us.

Please contact Fr. River if you would be interested in providing various forms of practical help for these groups.

ALLISON JACKSON

Allison Jackson is a student at San Francisco State University majoring in Psychology. This is her Senior year. She is doing an internship with Temenos for her class in Public Policy and Homelessness. Welcome, Allison!

WEEKLY EUCHARIST

Our weekly Eucharist takes place Sunday evenings at 6:30 p.m., in Cedar Alley at Polk Street, between Geary and Post. Beginning the second week in May, we hope to have an afternoon Eucharist at United Nations Plaza, as well.

THOUGHTS FROM MIKAEL